He Said, She Said

Just over two years ago I said "I Do" to my husband Joshua. The journey leading to that day was a stressful one, as I imagine it is for most people who are blending two separate lives into one. It felt especially crazy for me since I was job hunting and house hunting along with planning our wedding, working, and being in grad school...hard to believe I didn't drive Josh insane with all the unknowns we had going on at once. God definitely gave us some extra grace through all that... and being in premarital counseling certainly helped.

It still feels very new to be married and living in our home in the Antelope Valley. It's weird to come home after work to a husband, the dogs, and a *real* house with a yard and garden (I lived in an apartment for 7 years). Don't get me wrong, it's a GOOD weird but weird none the less. :-) I also still feel like a newlywed...when does that go away? 

For our anniversary this year we said our vows to each other again and it was such a special moment for me. Two years of married life later the words have more depth now than they did on our wedding day. Walking through life with each other, doing the everyday mundane things like chores, paying bills, and disagreeing about who should get to pick what to watch on Netflix...God uses it all to show me my heart and where I've got some growing to do. But in addition to revealing growth areas our time together has also made me be more in love with the man I married. I don't say "fall" more in love with because I don't think love is something you fall into...it takes choosing to put in the work and not allowing things to simmer or be swept under the rug.

Now it's only been two years so I won't pretend to be any kind of expert on relationships or marriage. (Maybe in a decade or two!) But I know I sure meant my vows when I got to say them again and it was a good reminder of what matters to us at the end of the day. So here they are, the he said she said from our wedding day...

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Joanna, 

I never thought I would be standing here, let alone with my soul mate. I had all but given up on dating and marriage when God led me to you. I used to think that things like soul mates were things writers made up to sell books, but now I know they exist, and I have found mine in you. You are everything I could have ever asked for in a wife, and then some. God made us for each other, and led us to each other at the perfect time. I am beyond blessed to have you as a wife. There is nothing about you that I do not love.

I promise to always love you, be there for you, encourage you, go on adventures with you, and spur you on in your walk with God. 

I also promise to be a Godly example in our household for our family. 

I promise to never let money or finances come between us. 

I promise to never let the flame of romance go out between us, even when we're old and gray.  

I promise to never intentionally hurt you. 

I promise to defend you. 

I promise to never leave you for anyone else. 

I promise not to leave your side until we are parted in death. 

I have been a few places in the world and met thousands of people, but there is nobody in the world for me, but you. 

In other words, Baby, you're stuck with me.

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My Joshua, 

When I met you the first thing that drew me to you was your honesty and willingness to be vulnerable. God had brought you through a valley similar to my own and you made it easy for me to love you and to trust you. I appreciate how you bring stability, laughter, logic, and dependability into my life. Adventuring through life with you is such a gift. I am so grateful God brought you into my life and it was no accident that brought us here today.

I promise to love you. To love you not just when you deserve it or when it’s easy, but when it’s hard too. 

I promise to choose love even when I don’t feel like it, because we have both had those days.

I promise to put God first and strive to live His grace out in the everyday moments of our lives.

I promise that I will work to be flexible and accept growth because I know that is one of the reasons God brought us together.

I promise to give myself to you alone and no outsider or earthly thing will come between us.

I promise to respect you. To help you see yourself as the kind, faithful, hard-working, and loving man you are.

I promise to serve alongside you, not pushing, pulling, or letting you walk alone, but with you as your partner. To laugh with you, cry with you, and live life with you.

I promise to encourage you, challenge you, forgive you, and trust you.

And after all this I promise there will be days where I fall short… Days when I will frustrate you and days when I will be hard to love, days I will need your forgiveness. But I promise God is bigger than our shortcomings and His love brings grace, renewal, hope, and purpose. He has been preparing me my whole life for you and I thank Him for bringing us together when we were ready.

I promise to be your helper, to give 100% to our marriage, and to love you (imperfectly) with the best of my ability.

I vow these things to you fully, with no reservations or limitations. I love you deeply and I gladly become your wife.

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I do! <3